5 SCARS OF THE STUMBLED AND MATURED
“When we have stumbled it is because we have been willing to risk a mistake. Stepping into an unknown, often without proper preparation or expected training, is no small act of courage. People who have stumbled have first been people of courage. That’s why I like people who have stumbled.”
The Stumbled Don't Understand Perfection
I like people who are not perfect. I like people who have stumbled. An interesting cultural phenomenon has emerged in the United States, in the context of public leadership. Leaders of almost all levels are expected to project images of infallibility.
In fact, if they are not essentially bulletproof in all walks of life, their critics rip them apart, sensing an advantage in their perceived weakness.
Likewise, we who are followers are subjected to scrutiny. If our boss detects a problem in our performance then we are written-up or subjected to some sort of corrective action.
Our employer surely has in mind a bigger picture, and a good manager will know the difference between a stumble and incompetence (or neglect)? <- Yes, that punctuation is a question mark.
Scars Measure Courage
Competitively, in recent years the concept of authenticity has taken hold as a desirable trait in all walks of life, and it is declared that when someone is authentic, they are therefore more trustworthy and real.
I rather enjoy this concept, because it tends to lower the bar of entry for most competencies. Whether it is professionally healthy is yet to be measured.
Under-appreciated Truth: When we have stumbled it is because we have been willing to risk a mistake. Stepping into an unknown, often without proper preparation or expected training, is no small act of courage.
People who have stumbled have first been people of courage. That's why I like people who have stumbled. It can go one of two ways after falling down. Simply, we can either try again or not.
Lessons About Stumbling
To say that a person who chooses not to try again has not learned from the stumble is incorrect. We are designed to calculate risk, and there are legitimate reasons why it may not make sense to immediately risk again.
Unfortunately, some who have stumbled never try again, and equally unfortunate is that there is often no one encouraging the next attempt. There are reasons one might not try again. Those who stumble:
🤕 SCAR #1: Could feel a sense of shame.
🤕 SCAR #2: Often have to rebuild from losses.
🤕 SCAR #3: Need encouragement at all levels.
🤕 SCAR #4: Dig deeper and longer to learn more.
🤕 SCAR #5: Tend to protect themselves differently.
Whether straightaway or after some reflection, it will always be true that the next attempt will be better than the first. The one who has stumbled:
Is seasoned by experience.
Has unpleasant memories.
Is able to empathize with others.
Understands margin.
Improved their skills.
Executes faster and more accurately.
Knows how to recover better and faster.
I have come to believe that if you have not stumbled, you don't know much. I envy the successful, the one who leads a charmed life, who is not as accustomed to the feeling of failure. I envy the one who has so much margin, they have no fear.
Recovery is Mature Expertise
I think the most pure sign of a burgeoning master is to be able to fail spectacularly and successfully revive oneself or someone else, making use of the lessons of the failure.
The path to expertise is to know how to recover as surely as it is to perform perfectly. Surely the master has been defeated more often than he has tasted victory? It is not only the avoidance of error that represents expertise.
We learn by doing, and we learn by re-doing. I like people who stumble, and I am one of them.
